missing chances

i felt to dissapointed with myself lately. i failed.

i was waiting for my food to be served at an al fresco cafe by the sidewalk.
there were two passers-by - an gran with his schoolboy apo.
the youngster pointed at the banana que displayed at the cafe - a gesture i used when i was a kid if i wanted mom to buy me something.

the gran asked the attendant how much a stick of two bananas is.
"tweleve," answered the attendant.

the gran then grabbed the arm of the boy and explained to him, "i can't afford it boy. it's expensive. let's check that store down the alley going home."

hesitantly and still looking at the banana cues, the boy walked along with the gran.

images of me during those times when i badly wanted something i can't afford came flashing before me. the emotions came rushing back. painful ones.

i wanted to buy one and hand it to the boy but my reflexes were just too slow. he and his gran were out of sight. i was too late.

twelve pesos is just twelve pesos on a payday. i missed the chance of making a little boy smile. i regret i missed that chance to share.